“hey,” drao leao hi, es his free hand to sooth harry’s wild hair bak, and really, really hopes that he doesn’t reber any of this the , beae drao is sittg way loser to hi than is stritly neessary “it’s ht? you won”
≈ say we drao is areful to never say we
“no” harry says, and drao wohis is what ade hi drk so uh tonight, the ories hidg that farae “it’s never over”
≈hks harry is jt goi his beargs and go to bed, so he leaves hi to his own devies and heads bak ig roo, where he ould wath the steps ase harry needs helpthe it’s a istake, though, beae harry os out with o gsses and a bottle of firewhiskey, the good stuff that you only buy if y to give it to soone as a gift
“you want one?”
he’s already p, and drao wants to say ired and harry has already had too uh to drk and is only n to sober up, and also beae les and brrg ahey are onstantly ger of divg to uers, ohey won’t ever be able to o bak fro
“e on”
it’s unfair, the way harry is lookg down at hi, how ihis feels, with the b piled his p ag low and the way harry is silg at hi, like he knows, has always known, that drao is uo say no to hi that he k stettg hen it atters
“don’t ake drk alone”
harry shakes the drk at hi a little, and drao annot s hiself, jt reahes out to take it fro hi, like it is not his owo ake
an hour ter, drao is a lot ore drunk and harry is a lot ore sober, ah sittied bathtub that drao had thought was so ool, both fully lothed but soaki
≈ reber how they got here, but sowhere the bak of his ihat this is a bad idea and that he should be gettg out of it while he still an what will they do when it’s ti to get out? or if they fall asleep and thehe freezg oldthe hell they thought this was a good idea? or wheo sit aross fro eah other at the breakfast table the a everythg is the sa?
≈ know, but he doesher, beae harry has ehe bubbles to float and dra the i shapes at harry’s request, beae they’re grown hihey’re oeeeen grown? it feels like it) they’re also so lose together that they’re knees are pressed up agaiher, ais harry will ath at his ar like he wants to say sothg iportant, but never does
“what are we dog?” drao doesn’t know what he is askily if he ans this ont, as ihey pretendg this is sothg ates would do if they were ser sale, as why he was evehe hoe at all, eneral, as , what are they thkg about these feelgs growihe like flowers that are only gog to be hoked out by weeds, beae he knows that harry is feelioo
“i don’t know” harry is bldgly i at tis like this, the ebodihat is good he is not soone who is prepared to expet disaster at every turer everythg he has seeo know?”
drao liked the sound of that, the not k sort of terrified hi
“no” he id his ar out ft alohe tub, and after a ont harry opied hi, their hands lyg lose enough sers touhed, but jt barely “we don’t”
they oved fro the bathtub to the bathr agaiher tht, harry’s head on drao’s shoulder
“i really don’t thk i want to be an auror anyore”
histhe silene, and drao uands what all the drkg was about, the lihe not wantg to be alo had nothg to do with hi at all
(but it did it had everythg to do with hi, with the both of the, a)
≈” the answer seed so siple whe like that, even though he k was anythg but harry was not a boy who was raised to s fightg he lived his life as a soldier for a war he dided fro the very ont he was born
“i don’t know how to be anythg else”
≈ be anythg” don’t you thk you’ve given enough? isn’t it ti that you got a hao figure out what life is when there are no g at your hells and keepg y? “jt be harry”
“i don’t know who that is”
the onfessions you ake when you are druhe sort of thgs you would never say while sober that’s the whole entire purp, to fih behiell yourself
“i do” it’s only beae he was erta harry would grabbed hold of his hand and pressed a kiss to the bak of his kill w that he got the hahis he does not feel like he deserves it, still “i’ll help you fd hi”
chapter 12
drao
draothe on the floor beh thelothes that aren’t his he has a fuzzy ory of stublg out of the bathroo to harry’s roo, and harry sayihg ab to have the heesy, traditional kd of sleepover, awoto figure out how to have a ovie night when harry is too drunk to read aons and drao had never even seen a dvd pyer before
it was a good night, evehat it will o bak to bite the i figure out but he’s okay with that,